To start your day with a call from the 911 operator?
Ah, yes... My favorite way to snap out of that quiet part of the morning - before anyone has started screaming "that's mine!" or "she's in my room!" or "get off of me! M-ahhhhhhh-m!!! He bit me!"
911 - "Ma'am - this is the 911 operator"
Me - "Oh - Good morning!"
911 - "Good morning ma'am. Did you know your phone line has been open to 911?"
Me - "No... Really? How long was that?"
911 - "About a minute or so."
Me - "Really?... Michaela? (who is pouring milk on her honey-nut scooters) Did you call 911?"
Mack - "NO - not me... " (yeah... right...)
Me - "This has happened to us before - except it was my husband that was playing around with the speed dial while going through his 'morning routine'... I was very surprised to answer the door to a female police officer and yelled - 'honey? did you call 911?' and he told me he had just been messing around with the phone while sitting on the pot."
911 - "Ah" (snort...)
Me - "Well thanks for calling..."
911 - "Yes ma'am. (chuckling) Also - to let you know - the police will be stopping by..."
Me - "Great! Hopefully mommy will have time to get her bra on first..."
911 - "Have a good day Ma'am..." (still chuckling)
Me - "Thanks so much... (click) MICHAELA!?"
Zack - "It was me mom..." (the smartest move he's made today...)
A minute or so later the doorbell rang and the dog went berserk. Thankfully I'd pulled on some p.j. pants before the phone rang. You really don't want to leave a police officer waiting on your porch when he's responding to a 911 call...
Zachary got dressed faster than I've ever seen and came in to speak with the officer standing in our living room while I tried to use Oscar the dog to keep me modest...
The doorbell rang again... back-up had arrived.
I was half tempted to ask them to just cuff me and take me away...
Lesson learned - I think. Apparently they didn't believe me when I told them 911 shows up - whether it's a real emergency or just a bit of constipation.
I'm hopeful this is our last encounter with the men in blue.